SnM goes to Comic-Con

We weren't invited by mistake. It's cool, though. Accidents happen. That's why god gave us erasers and guns.

Since I'm as suave as my mustache is curly, I never even heard of this so called nerd fest, but as soon as Skyler informalized me to it, I knew SnM had to be there or die trying.

There were many obstacles in our path to glory: San Diego was far as fuck away (you know...when you're lazy), I don't go no money dollars, and Skyler's car repels skanks faster than his ugly face does. Luckily, Lee's got business savy street smarts. He knows a good investment when he sees one. We sealed the deal in seconds, with some half-assed carboard pie charts and a well-wacked shovel to the dome piece. After he was wowed unconciousness (or dead, we're too important to bother with vital signs), he forked over his wallet and car keys and wished us the best of luck. We loaded his shiny pimp mobile with comic funnies and set off in search of adventure.

You shoulda seen me drop my name on the security fucks like I owned the place. It was all "Right this way, Mr. Powell," and "Have another beer while I tickle your balls." Skyler didn't get in. I forget why. Something about police and a stolen vehicle.

Once inside, everyone kept eying my backstage pass and telling me how great "swallow me whole" was. After fifteen or so times, I finally tired of of telling them to "swallow my cock" and asked some goofy nerd what the fuck he was talking about. Turns out, Swallow me Whole is this book by some Nate Powell jack ass.

I was about to stab a fool and call some attention to how doper The Decadence is, but they announced this Eisner Award my way. It came with a check, which I graciously accepted.

Comic con is a lot of things to a lot of unimportant people, but I'll always remember it is that time I scored enough loot to buy week's worth of cocain.